Mario's Day of Randomness
by SuperMarioSunshine
Summary: My first fic, reloaded because of the site rules. Please read and review!


Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters. Except for me.

A/N: Gah. Stupid site rules. This is a redone version of my first fic. It got taken down because of the no chat/script format thing.

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**Mario's Day of Randomness**

**By: SuperMarioSunshine**

It was a beautiful day outside…when suddenly, the bears attacked!

"Bears? We have bears here?" asked Mario.

Yes. Now shut up. Anyway, the bears ate their way through everything! The trees, the ground, even the castle.

"How do you eat a castle?" questionated Peach.

How should I know? They just did. Then, Wario came to save the day.

"I'm here to save the day!" exclaimed Wario.

"Duh. The narrator-dude said you would," said Mario.

Suddenly, Mario exploded due to extreme Phazon radiation.

"Phazon!? WHERE!?" exclaim-questionated a Space Pirate.

The Space Pirate then exploded due to sheer stupidity.

"Oh no! Now who will save me from Bowser?" wondered Peach.

"I will!" said Luigi

"Hey!" cried Daisy.

"What? I'm not your boyfriend." Said Luigi.

Just then, a swarm of rabid DaisyLuigi fanboys/fangirls come and beat up Luigi.

"Owwwww…" remarked a very trampled over Luigi.

Remind me never to piss off rabid fanpeople. Anyway, Mario suddenly reappears.

"That was strange," said Mario

"What's it like," Peach asked "being dead and all?"

"You get anything you want in heaven. Except for any sex or violence type things," Mario said, "And there's a shortage on chairs."

"Oh," said Peach.

"Yeah," Mario said.

Wario then asked, "What about me and the bears?"

Oh, yes. Wario and the bears. Well, Wario got massacred by them.

"Did not!" argued Wario.

Did too.

"Did not!" again argued Wario.

Did too.

"Did no-(notices the bears advancing towards him)-oh, crap," said a very sad-looking Wario.

Eeeyuck. Waluigi suddenly appears.

"I will kill those bears!" said Waluigi, as he started swatting the bears with his tennis racket.

"Stop right there!" exclaimed some very P. O.-ed PETA people.

"Oh no…not them again…" sighed Mario.

"You guys are hurting these poor bears!" said random PETA guy.

"They ate our castle!" argued Peach.

"Bears need to eat too, you know!" said random PETA gal.

Then, a gigantic hole appeared below the PETA people.

"Oh, $#," said random PETA guy as they all fell into it.

"Hooray!" cheered Waluigi, who then goes back to beating up the bears.

"GWAHAHAHAH! I'm here for the princess! (Steps forward, hears something go squish) Eeeeew…is that Luigi?" wondered Bowser.

'Fraid so.

"My spleen!" cried Luigi.

"_Now _are you my boyfriend?" asked Daisy.

"Y-y-y-yes!" stammered Luigi.

"Good. Now come, personal love slave!" said Daisy with a smile.

"WHAT!? I didn't agree to that!" an outraged Luigi said.

"I'll call the even rabider hardcore fanpeople…" threatened Daisy.

"Yes, master…" Luigi said with a sigh.

"My poor, poor brother. Oh well," said Mario.

"Why won't anyone pay attention to my super-powerful awesome-o-ness?" cried Bowser.

"Because you're such a loser that you keep an axe at the end of the bridge you're on," said Mario.

Bowser looks down and sees he's on a bridge with an axe at the end of it.

"Oh, crap," said Bowser.

Mario runs over and chops the bridge, sending Bowser into…a candy river?

"Candy! Yay!" cried Bowser, who then dived into it like a kid in…well, a candy river. Duh.

"That has to be the most convenient plot device ever," whined Mario.

Oh, shut up. I'll make you explode again.

"You'll just bring me back anyway," said a confident-ish Mario.

Wanna take that risk?

"Not really," said a now not-really-confident-ish Mario.

Good. Now over to Waluigi. Whose racket has broken in half and is now using his golf clubs.

"Back! Back vile beasts! Into the abyss with ye!" said Waluigi, in an almost medieval tone.

"What abyss?" asked Bear Numero Uno

"That one, over…wait, you guys can talk?" wondered a confuzzled Waluigi.

"Why yes, we can, old chaps. Care for a bit of tea and crumpets?" said Bear Numero Dos in a British tone.

"Okay, then can you answer this question?" said Mario.

"Shoot," said Bear I

"WHY ARE YOU EATING THE TOWN!?" cried Mario.

"Oh, that. We were hungry," said Bear #1.

"Can't you guys go eat at, oh, say, Beanbean Castle Town?" said Waluigi, who surprisingly knew about that place.

"Hey, who says we can't get video games over here?" asked Waluigi.

"Got a map?" asked the British Bear.

"Sure," said Mario who then gives him the map from Mario and Luigi: Superstar Saga.

"Thanks, old chap," said British Bear.

The bears run away, but not before another bear that didn't say anything bites Waluigi's right arm off.

"My arm! My beautiful arm!" whined Waluigi.

Hey! Not his arm! Just then, a lightning bolt zaps Bear #3 in half, making Waluigi's arm magically reattach to his body.

"Yay!" exclaimed a happy Waluigi.

Luigi runs in.

"AHHHHH!!!!" screamed Luigi as he ran by.

A swarm of even rabider fanpeople swarmed by?

"GO BACK AND BE DAISY'S LOVE SLAVE!" cried the fanpeople.

"Never! She did an unspeakable thing!" cried Luigi.

Oh, that's it…suddenly, the fanpeople fall down the same hole the PETA people fell down. And just as the PETA people were climbing out, too.

"Ow! No fair!" whined the fanpeople.

"Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah," teased Luigi.

"We'll get you yet!" vowed the fanpeople.

Oh, will you? The hole fills with cement. The quick-drying variety.

"Ahhhh!" screamed the fanpeople and the PETA people as they died.

A construction crew comes by and builds a Mega Starbucks with a parking lot on it.

"Woo! Mega Starbucks!" exclaimed Mario.

"They must've run out of room in the real world," said Peach

Luigi rushes in and buys a Mega Octuple Espresso.

"Should we stop him?" questioned Mario.

"Nah. It'll add to the randomness," said Waluigi.

Luigi then chugs it in one breath.

"Wasn't that thing the size of Luigi himself?" asked Peach.

Who cares?

"WAHOO! YIPPEE!" cried Luigi as he bounced off the walls inside Mega Starbucks.

"Sir, if you're going to do that, go into the bouncing-off-the-wall section. (Opens a door, showing a lot of people bouncing off the walls in a heavily padded rubber room) Please go in," said the Mega Starbucks Employee."

Luigi then bounces in, and the MSE shuts the door quickly, and one of the people crashes in the door, leaving a person-shaped dent in the door.

Scene shifts to Bowser, who is lazily floating down Candy River.

"I'm stuffed. I wonder where this leads?" wondered Bowser.

At that point in the river, the candy starts turning into…molten lava!

"Ahhhh! It burns!" Bowser said as he jumped to shore.

Just then, he sees the river ends at Bowser's Castle's Moat.

"All this time, Candy River has been in my moat? Except it turned into Lava River at that point? Whatever. Time for TV," said Bowser as he went inside to watch the Mushroom Mushers face the Koopa Krashers football game.

Cut back to Mega Starbucks, where Luigi has finally calmed down, and comes out of the BOTWS.

"Well, that was fun," Luigi remarked as he walked out, and sees the others playing Poker, along with Wario, who came back during the shift to Bowser.

"Pair of Aces," said Peach.

"Three of a Kind," said Mario

"Four of a Kind," said Waluigi.

"Royal Flush! I win!" Wario shouted as he raked in the chips.

"Again!?" screamed Mario.

"That's the fifteenth time in a row you've gotten a Royal Flush!" added Waluigi.

"Cheater! Get him!" said Peach.

They all dogpile onto Wario, tearing and scratching, biting and kicking, punching and spitting.

"Ow! Cut it out! Ow ow ow ow ow!" cried Wario.

"Man, you guys started the fun without me," said a sad Luigi.

"There's room on the leg," said Mario.

"…do you know how wrong that sounded?" asked Luigi.

"Just shut up and beat up his leg," said Mario.

"Whatever," Luigi said as he bit Wario's leg.

"&#(&#&##&!" cursed Wario.

Just then, the Mega Starbucks exploded!

"Noooo! That was my main source of energy!" cried Luigi.

To be continued…

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A/N: Well, I hope you guys liked it. I'll probably do a second chapter soon, so please review! 


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